Becoming a parent is an exciting and life-changing experience. It’s a time of joy, love, and wonder, but it’s also a time of major physical and emotional changes. Overnight, you and your partner are responsible for your newborn’s survival, and there’s no one way to do any part of postpartum, which can make the decisions you face feel SO overwhelming, especially for first time moms. One of the most common questions new parents ask in my therapy practice is so version of this question: how long will it take for me to feel like myself again after birth? The answer is not straightforward, as each individual’s experience is unique. However, there are some general timelines and factors that can affect how quickly you can return to feeling like yourself postpartum.
Physically, the postpartum period lasts around six weeks. During this time, your body will undergo significant changes as it heals and recovers from giving birth. It’s common to experience physical discomfort, such as soreness, bleeding, and cramping, as well as fatigue and sleeplessness due to the demands of caring for a newborn. Resting physically, sleeping when you can, staying hydrated, and eating nourishing foods can help you feel better faster. If you had complications, this phase may be unique to your birth and recovery, and can last years. That isn’t what anyone wants to hear, but it’s important to know that there are many women who face the same unexpected and individual challenges, when if feels like everyone else has been able to heal. This can feel unfair and defeating, and it’s important to get support to navigate the unexpected and unknown. There are many supportive online communities you can join to get help and community.
Emotionally, the postpartum period can be more variable. Some new parents feel an immediate bond with their baby and experience a sense of euphoria after giving birth. However, it’s not uncommon for others to experience a range of emotions, including anxiety, mood swings, and sadness, commonly known as the “baby blues.” This can last up to three weeks and is a normal part of the postpartum experience. However, if you continue to feel this way or if your symptoms worsen, you may be experiencing postpartum depression or anxiety and should seek help from a healthcare provider.
Many women are surprised to learn that even after enjoying the newborn phase, postpartum depression and postpartum anxiety can creep into their postpartum experience at 3 months, 6 months, and even 9 months postpartum. Often times these seemingly delayed perinatal mood disorder experiences are tired to other changes, like going back to work or changes in the baby’s feeding (ie – weaning, which comes with many hormone changes). Sometimes, this can lead to parents can feeling like they can’t catch a break, and when they settle into a new routine and finally feel more stable, something comes along and distrupts them. You aren’t doing anything wrong, and many new parents feel this way.
Factors such as the type of birth experience, support system, and overall health can also affect how long it takes to feel like yourself again postpartum. For example, if you had a difficult birth, it may take longer to recover physically and emotionally. Additionally, having a supportive partner, family, or friends can make a significant difference in how quickly you can adjust to your new role as a parent. Finally, taking care of your mental and physical health through self-care activities such as exercise, healthy eating, and connecting with others can help you feel more like yourself more quickly. If these feel like impossible hurdles to take on, while caring for a baby, you aren’t alone, and might benefit from the support or a postpartum doula, therapist, or other care provider who can help you set attainable goals. If you haven’t already, check out my postpartum course to help get you started.
In conclusion, the postpartum period is a unique and challenging time for many new parents. It’s common to wonder how long it takes to feel like yourself again after giving birth. While the physical recovery lasts around six weeks, the emotional recovery can vary widely. Within the first year, most women find their way back to themselves… often times women describe themselves as not quite feeling like they’ve returned to their pre-baby self, but in a new state of confidence and peace with themselves, taking pieces of who they were and settling into who they are now. By taking care of yourself, seeking help if needed, and having a supportive network, you can navigate this period with more ease and return to feeling like yourself more quickly. Be gentle with yourself, and remember that it won’t always be this hard. <3
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