Becoming a parent can be an incredibly rewarding experience, but it can also come with its own unique set of challenges. One of these challenges that new parents may face is intrusive thoughts, which can be particularly common in the postpartum period. Postpartum intrusive thoughts are unwanted, distressing thoughts or images that can pop into your head, often at random times during the postpartum period. They can be quite distressing and may cause significant anxiety or distress, adding to an already challenging season of life.
Postpartum intrusive thoughts can take many different forms and can vary greatly from person to person. Some common examples of what intrusive thoughts can look and sound like postpartum are:
- Thoughts of harm coming to your baby: Many new parents experience intrusive thoughts about harm coming to their baby. These thoughts can take many different forms, from worries about your baby choking on their food or suffocating in their sleep, to more extreme fears of someone kidnapping or harming your child.
- Worries about your own abilities as a parent: Being a new parent can be overwhelming, and many new parents worry about whether they are doing a good job. Intrusive thoughts can take the form of worries about your own abilities as a parent, such as worries that you are not feeding your baby enough, or that you are not providing enough stimulation for your child.
- Fear of accidentally causing harm: New parents are often hyper-vigilant about their baby’s safety, and this can lead to intrusive thoughts about accidentally causing harm. For example, you may worry about dropping your baby or accidentally leaving them in a hot car.
- Sexual thoughts or fears: Postpartum intrusive thoughts can also take the form of sexual thoughts or fears. For example, you may have intrusive thoughts about sexual acts that you find disturbing or unacceptable, or you may have fears about being sexually attracted to your baby.
- Intrusive memories: Intrusive thoughts can also take the form of memories that you find disturbing or traumatic. For example, you may have intrusive memories of a difficult or traumatic birth experience, or of an event that occurred during your pregnancy that was distressing.
- Self-harm thoughts: Some new parents may experience intrusive thoughts about harming themselves. These thoughts can be quite distressing and may be linked to feelings of overwhelm or anxiety.
It’s important to note that having intrusive thoughts does not mean that you are a bad parent or that you are going to act on your thoughts. Intrusive thoughts are a normal and common experience, and they do not reflect your true desires or intentions. However, it’s also important to seek help if your intrusive thoughts are causing you significant distress or interfering with your ability to function.
If you are struggling with intrusive thoughts postpartum, there are a few things you can do to help manage them. First, it can be helpful to talk to a mental health professional who can provide support and guidance. They can help you develop coping strategies and provide tools to manage your thoughts. If you’re based in California, I’d be honored to work with you to get you the skills you need – you can reach out the me here.
Additionally, practicing self-care can be an important part of managing intrusive thoughts. This can include things like getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet, and engaging in regular exercise or physical activity. It can also be helpful to take breaks when you need them, and to prioritize activities that bring you joy and relaxation.
Intrusive thoughts can be a distressing experience, especially for new parents who are already navigating a host of new challenges. However, it’s important to remember that you are not alone, and that there are resources available to help you manage your thoughts and feelings. With the right support and self-care, it is possible to overcome intrusive thoughts and move forward with confidence and resilience as a new parent.
