Pregnancy loss can be a devastating and traumatic experience for anyone who has gone through it. As someone who has been through it personally, and walked alongside countless friends and therapy clients, I can assure you: it’s a significant loss that often requires time and space to heal. Therapy after miscarriage is a helpful tool in processing your loss, and moving forward.
While the physical effects of a miscarriage or stillbirth eventually heal, the emotional scars can linger for months, if not years, after the loss. Many women and their partners find themselves struggling with feelings of sadness, grief, guilt, anger, and even depression in the aftermath of pregnancy loss. This is normal; the loss is significant.
As a grieving mom, it can be easy to forget that you are a postpartum mom; that you body was growing a baby, and just as you would have experienced a hormone crash if your pregnancy and postpartum had gone the way you expected, you’ll likely experience one during your loss as your body attempts to find it’s new normal.
Beyond the physical and hormonal changes, one of the hardest parts of loss is when your friends family, and even sometimes your partner seem to move on, but you find yourself still wanting to talk about your baby, but don’t have anyone to process , grieve alongside, and heal with.
Every once in a while, I’ll have a woman reach out who says some version of “it’s not like therapy can bring back my baby”. The truth is, she’s right: no amount or type of therapy can give you the experience you were expecting. But, therapy after miscarriage can provide key supports in a vulnerable, painful season of your life.
Here are a few ways that therapy after miscarriage can help:
- Validation of feelings: One of the most important aspects of therapy after a pregnancy loss is the validation of feelings. It can be challenging for women and their partners to express their emotions to friends and family members who may not understand what they are going through. During therapy, individuals can express themselves without fear of judgment or rejection, and they can receive validation and support for their feelings.
- Coping strategies: Therapists can help individuals develop coping strategies to deal with the pain and grief that accompanies pregnancy loss. This can include techniques such as mindfulness meditation, breathing exercises, journaling, and self-care practices. By learning how to manage their emotions in healthy ways, individuals can prevent the pain of their loss from becoming overwhelming.
- Time and space to talk about the baby: As you find yourself hitting expected milestones, like a scheduled doctors appointment, registry or tracker updates, baby shower timelines, the estimated due date, or the anniversary of loss, many women find themselves triggered and unsure how to process these different stages of grief. When friends and family have moved on, therapy can provide a space to process these moments.
- Relationship support: Pregnancy loss can take a toll on relationships, and therapy can provide a safe space for couples to communicate with one another and work through any issues that may have arisen as a result of their loss. By talking openly and honestly with one another in therapy, couples can deepen their understanding of one another and strengthen their bond.
- Planning for the future: For women and their partners who hope to try again for a pregnancy in the future, therapy can provide support in the form of planning for the future. By working with a therapist, individuals can develop a plan for how to move forward, including any necessary medical interventions, and prepare emotionally for the next pregnancy.
In conclusion, therapy after miscarriage can be a valuable tool in the healing process. By providing a safe and supportive space to process emotions, develop coping strategies, talk about the baby, work through relationship issues, and plan for the future, therapy can help individuals heal and move forward after a devastating loss.
How To Find Support After A Miscarriage
If you or someone you know has experienced a pregnancy loss, consider reaching out to a therapist who specializes in this area to receive the support and guidance needed to begin the healing process.
Maybe you don’t feel quite ready to take the emotional or financial plunge into therapy, but want some support after your miscarriage consider taking my miscarriage class. If the financial burden is too much, please reach out to me and we can find a fee that fits your budget; I want you to have access to the tools available to you.
